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You can consider this article as part II of my previous post, “Secure in the Everlasting Arms

God has already promised eternal security to those who have faith in Him and love Him. However, we must be willing to accept that security and let God have His way. Too often I find myself not going to God for security, and going to other things instead. I’m not regularly laying my life in God’s hands and telling Him “God, You know and do what’s best. Please have Your way in me. My security lies in Your hands and Yours alone.”

Some questions I ask myself include, “where does my security lie?” “Am I willing to lay everything I know on the altar?” “Will I forsake everything I have for the sake of Christ and take up my cross in following Him?” “If I lose everything, will I still say, Lord, I am secure in your arms?”

To have faith of this degree, I would have to have no other security than that in Christ. This is unconditional faith. It’s not something that can be found in every believer, but it should be. After all, we serve an omniscient, omnipotent God. We are told to not lean on our own understanding or strength, but to find our strength and ability in God’s power. We are to have God be our primary focus in life. If we find strength in God’s power, what are we afraid of? If God is our primary focus, and the only foundation on which we stand, why would we want to pursue anything else?

God is my security. That I have concluded. However, now I’m wondering what is keeping me from serving God whole-heartedly. What are the strongholds in my life that are obstacles on the path to Him? Why is it that I have not yet overcome these obstacles and run into God’s hands to give my heart and all to Him?

I believe that it is because of the fact that I still find security in these obstacles. They are a part of me, so to speak, and am allured by the familiar. I still idolize my obstacles and am determined to stay where I am comfortable. I want to have a pure, loving relationship with God, but I’m not willing to release my security in those obstacles. The obstacles are my “competing affections,” things that take hold of my love and keep me from giving it all to God. It is my pride that induces me to audaciously believe that I can do things on my own, that I can do everything I want on my own strength, and that I don’t need to fully surrender my heart to God.

What in insane idea! What could be better than being with God, to know that I am a helpless infant who can find security in the person who made me, the world around me, and the universe! What could be better than serving God with everything that I have, knowing that in joyfully and humbly serving Him, I will know Him more and more intimately.

Am I scared that if I follow God’s commandments, I will lose my reputation? Am I scared that if I will lose those closest to me, and that I will be left with nothing? Am I scared that I don’t have enough faith? Am I scared that if my pride is broken, I will be so shattered that there is nothing of me is left?

My identity is in Christ alone, as a child of the Lord Most High. I should place my loved ones in God’s hands and pray that He will gain them as well. It is not my faith that saved me and protects me, but God’s love and His grace. The Lord despises the proud but blesses the humble.

Tell me again… why have I not wholeheartedly given myself to the Lord?

He is more than enough.

He is everything good and eternal.

He made love.

He is love.

If I have God — if I have Love — what would I lack?

Nothing.

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This past week, I finished my junior year of high school and witnessed the senior class’ graduation. As the activities and days flew by, I found myself pondering my future plans. Among the common questions such as what to write in personal statements, what colleges to apply to, et cetera, I also found myself asking questions about my spiritual growth and faith.

One question, with several components, weighed heavily on my heart and in my mind: is my future completely consecrated to the Lord? Are my plans aligned with His, in that I am willing to follow His guidance even if it goes completely against what society says I should do? Am I depending on Him with faith that He will preserve me in my college years, and that I would be adequately prepared during my last two summers and my senior year of high school to not only retain, but also to share my faith when I enter college?

These questions are difficult to answer, if answers even exist. I find myself desperate to find ways to connect with God, to depend on Him. But what does it mean to “let go and let God?” How much of my work should I do by myself, and leave the rest in faith? As I struggle with these questions, my only assurance comes from the faith that if I continue seeking God in prayer and meditating on His Word, He will guide me in the right direction.

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.

Romans 12:2

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths.

Proverbs 3:5-6

As an almost-high-school-senior, the “will of God” is something I hold to be very, very important. If I stray from what He wants me to do, I could become lost and confused. Therefore, this coming year, I want to make every effort to be conformed to God’s standards and transformed by renewing my mind with His Word. I want to come faithfully to Him in prayer and meditation on His Word every day, that through this regular time with God I would be able to discern what He wants me to do in every situation.

If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with Him in glory.”

Colossians 3:1-4

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose.

Romans 8:28

As I continue this journey of life, I am also reminded to set my heart and mind on God’s plan for mankind. Getting a good education, and the plans and events that follow, is merely a method of preparing myself to be as useful to the Lord as possible. It is not to be my primary focus in life, but it is to be an aid. No matter what happens in my life, what joys and disasters, everything is done for the glory of God, that His will may be done on earth through His people.

With this mindset and assurance of the necessity of unconditional faith and God’s vision, I can take on the road ahead with confidence. However, it is not without prayer and the work of others that I can even begin this journey. I pray that my fellow brothers and sisters can encourage me in the years to come, and that I can return the blessing.

A passage in Romans 8 gives me an important closing reminder of the power of Him who is in me:

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? As it is written, “For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:35-38

Finally, let me not forget what the Lord has promised about my future, if only I fully consecrate myself and my future to Him:

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will hear you. You will seek Me and find Me, when you seek Me with all your heart.

Jeremiah 29:11-13

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One question that weighed heavily on my heart tonight was why so many Christians emphasize digging into God’s Word. Why should we crave the Word? What does it even mean to crave it? Why should we read the Bible every day and hide it in our hearts? As I pondered the questions, God brought to my mind several thoughts.

We desire the Word of God because it draws us closer to His heart.

When we hear the Word of God, it inspires and rejuvenates us, sparking life within us and opening our eyes, heart, and mind to receive a refreshing drink of God’s Spirit.

When we read the Word of God, we become allured by God’s thoughts: what He desires, His joys, and what saddens Him.

When we memorize the Word of God, it becomes ingrained in the constitution of our mind and being; imprinted upon our spirit. It transforms our mind to be synoptical with that of the Lord’s; it convicts us of evil, inspires us to love, and equips us with the courageous faith God grants those who relentlessly seek after Him.

The irresistible longing for God that drives us from the inside out to seek His face and know His thoughts comes from His grace.

So take freely of it, receive it, process it, and dispense it.

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The Lord is harsh with me.

Maybe even brutal.

It’s my fault, really. I could have listened to what He said earlier. I could have heeded His nudges and convictions. But no, I had to wait for Him to literally drop an anvil on my head and crush me into noticing Him again.

Looking back, I can distinguish those small moments where God nudged me, whispered to me, that I need to change or give up something in my life. I ignored it the first time, discarded the idea the second, and refused to acknowledge the third. My chances are up, and God still wants my attention. I can count how many times he used the big guns on me. Every time he does, I learn a lesson I could just have easily learned if I had paid attention to His gentle whisper.

And [the angel of the Lord] said, “Go out and stand on the mount before the Lord.” And behold, the Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind tore the mountains and broke in pieces the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. And after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. And after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire the sound of a low whisper. And when Elijah heard it, he wrapped his face in his cloak and went out and stood at the entrance of the cave. And behold, there came a voice to him and said, “What are you doing here, Elijah?” – 1 Kings 19:11-13

I really appreciate the deeper meaning of this passage. One would expect the “God of the Old Testament” to appear in a hurricane and lightning to speak to His prophet in a rumbling and thunderous voice. However, that was not the case; He chose to speak in “a low whisper.” Elijah paid no heed to the wind, the earthquake, and the fire. When he heard the whisper, however, he came out to meet with the Lord.

I believe that God wants to speak to His children with the tenderness a parent would to their child. He doesn’t need to utilize the forces of nature or use extreme experiences to pass instructions to His servants. They already know He exists and that He’s there. His voice can be as gentle, as soft, and delicate as a whisper. His convictions can be a small nudge to your conscience.

Too often we expect to hear from God in extraordinary ways, divine intervention, or through supernatural acts. We expect Him to slap us with revelation and call to us with brothers and sisters pressuring us to follow His word. We don’t want to quiet down and simply wait and listen. Why do we not pay heed to His nudges and whispers? I sometimes have these scary moments where something someone says sounds like they spoke directly from God, especially when it comes from a nonbelieving person or a brother or sister who usually doesn’t discuss matters of the faith. It pierces me, but it is still a painless experience compared to the trials God throws me in if I didn’t pay attention.

It’s not that hard to know when God is whispering… it may be your Bible lying near you, a song on the radio, or a comment by a friend. When you notice, take care to listen to Him. Take heed to what He says, because truly, you can save yourself a lot of pain by simply listening the first time He whispers to you.

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As believers, I’m sure most of us have been taught that we should preach the gospel to unbelievers, especially those close to us. Some of us have learned that preaching the Gospel to ourselves is an extremely helpful and healthy habit. However, what about our believing friends? Don’t they need the Gospel too?

Here is one of my favorite quotes of all time.

Preach the Gospel at all times. Use words if necessary.

We usually interact with our friends on a regular basis, especially those of us in high school… It’s every day! We’re comfortable around each other. So comfortable, in fact, that we would act in certain ways that we may not with other people.

I’m an introvert. As such, I’ve spent quite a lot of time quietly observing people interact with each other. It saddens me when I see people act so comfortably, they use language they wouldn’t say and do things they wouldn’t do in, say, a professional setting. Sometimes the language my believing friends use or the things they do sadden me; they don’t know how their actions can so easily become a stumbling block to other believers. The images their dirty language conjures and the innuendo in their actions can fill their brothers and sisters’ minds with material that shouldn’t be there.

This is where the quote comes in. It is important for believers to fill their minds with the things of God and to act as such. Rehearsing the Gospel daily and having it reflected in our actions will speak to our fellow believers. It reminds us that we are fallen sinners who were bought by the blood of our Father’s only Son through the Father’s mercy and love, and that we are no longer our own but indebted to serve Him in holiness and purity. If actions truly speak louder than words, then how we act has much more influence then constantly pestering them with Bible verses and a list of does and dont’s. It also gives us more credibility while hindering hypocrisy.

Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. – 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Remind them of these things, and charge them before God not to quarrel about words, which does no good, but only ruins the hearers.  Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth. But avoid irreverent babble, for it will lead people into more and more ungodliness, and their talk will spread like gangrene. Among them are Hymenaeus and Philetus, who have swerved from the truth, saying that the resurrection has already happened. They are upsetting the faith of some. But God’s firm foundation stands, bearing this seal: “The Lord knows those who are his,” and, “Let everyone who names the name of the Lord depart from iniquity.” Now in a great house there are not only vessels of gold and silver but also of wood and clay, some for honorable use, some for dishonorable. Therefore, if anyone cleanses himself from what is dishonorable, he will be a vessel for honorable use, set apart as holy, useful to the master of the house, ready for every good work. So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. Have nothing to do with foolish, ignorant controversies; you know that they breed quarrels. And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, after being captured by him to do his will. – 2 Timothy 2:14-26

Let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven. – Matthew 5:16

Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity. – 1 Timothy 4:12

He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the LORD require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God? – Micah 6:8

All believers need the Gospel every day. We need to remind ourselves each day of God’s love and desire for us to be His sanctified priests and future Bride. Without Him, we are nothing, but in Him, we have everything. Our actions reflect what we know, believe, and is in our hearts. We just need to make sure that we are reflecting Christ and the Gospel.

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Alone

In the past few weeks, I’ve been dealing with a number of issues in my life. They concern, however, topics that I rarely discuss with people. These issues bombard my mind, and I find myself almost driven to tears over them.

A result of this struggle is constant loneliness. Sure, I feel good when I’m talking to friends and hanging out with people. I don’t feel lonely during those times. However, when I find myself in situations where I slip easily into the matrix of my thoughts, I become desperately lost. I can’t fathom how I will deal with these issues alone. I need to talk to someone, but I don’t know who. I feel like no one can understand how I feel, cliche as it may sound. I keep pushing the issues away. I’ll deal with them later. They haunt me. In a clash of my Christian faith and what the world says is ok, I’m afraid that I might just give up and give in completely to the world’s values (or lack thereof).

Honestly, I have no idea what’s keeping me going. Maybe it’s hope. Maybe it’s faith (though I personally don’t think I have that strong a faith). Maybe it’s the Lord’s mercy. Maybe it’s love. Maybe it’s fear.

I am given the constant reminder, however, of the fact that I can talk to God about my problems. I can choose to rest in His promises and power. I find it so difficult. It is almost like He is the last person I want to talk to about these issues. So I push Him away. I’ll go back when I solve all these problems.

To a certain degree, I hate myself for being such a good actor. I am not doing well at all inside. I’ve become insecure, scared, and inconsistent. On the outside though, I still look like the quiet “innocent kid” who is prone to excitement, laughter, and practical jokes. It shocks me sometimes how easy it is to fool the world of a person’s true emotional and mental state. The only good that resulted from this shocking revelation is the fact that maybe in the future, or even now, I should start asking people how they’re really doing. Give them a should to cry on, advice when they don’t know what to do, guide them when they become lost, minister to them when they feel broken, reconcile them with their anger, and calm them when they feel upset.

I just wish someone would do that for me.

I know I should talk to God, but I just can’t. I don’t know why this is happening; if this is a trial I’m supposed to go through. All I know is that these issues are driving me to tears, and I need to talk. If I don’t let everything out, I fear I may explode. Some verses and hymns give me limited condolence, as does being with fellow believers. But they aren’t enough.

These trials from God are very much real. I’m just wondering if everything will work out in the end…

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The Christian faith demands a lot from believers. From moral uprightness to sharing the gospel, there is always something we can improve on or an area we can grow in. It seems, however, that the list is never-ending. For some, there is a “limit” to how upright they are or how many people they have evangelized. It is sort of like saying, “I’ve reached my goal. Now it’s finished. I’m done.”

The concern that I have, however, is this: Christ has called us to give all of ourselves up to Him, for only then will we reap the benefits of a relationship with Him.

And He said to all, “If anyone would come after Me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will save it. For what does it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses or forfeits himself? For whoever is ashamed of Me and of My words, of him will the Son of Man be ashamed when He comes in His glory and the glory of the Father and of the holy angels…”

– Luke 9:23-26

You will seek Me and find Me, when you seek Me with all your heart.

– Jeremiah 29:13

You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

– Matthew 5:48

I know your works: you are neither cold nor hot. Would that you were either cold or hot! So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth.

– Revelation 3:15-16

When I say “concern”, it does mean that I have a problem with it; the problem being the high standard. In my sinful nature, I cannot fully give myself completely to the Lord and submit to His will. I am still called, however, to live in holiness and obedience. In my interpretation, this means that regardless of my capabilities, I must continue to strive for perfection in Christ. Never stopping, never ending, for the rest of my life. In all this striving, I become more and more Christ-like, ultimately drawing closer to the heart of God.

If I stop striving and become lukewarm, I miss out on all the lessons God could have taught me if I remained in the faith. I also miss out on lessons that can be learned from prolonged persistence in my walk with Him.

In being lukewarm, which in my definition is still calling myself a saved believer, yet living like someone who’s unsaved, I set a bad example for younger believers, discourage peer and older believers, and misrepresent Christ and the Church. I should pretty much give up any claim on the title of a Christian, lest my actions become a stumbling block to others.

Hot or cold… which one will I choose to be? Will I give all of myself, or nothing at all?

In the eyes of the world, it may be two extremes; a black or white; however in the eyes of God, it’s simply a commitment I must keep.

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